Get Out of My Space
LIFE STORIES
Photo by Maël BALLAND from Pexels
Evidence in the behavior of different species is enough to substantiate that the concepts of personal space and territoriality are inter-linked. In terms of an evolutionary perspective, this makes complete sense. Animals can more effectively defend grouped resources if they stake out their territory. Human nature is also reflective of this pattern.
This essay will discuss personal space, and territoriality in psychological terms and explore how it impacts human behavior as I share my episode of discovering space. There is something fishy about it.
Personal space and crowding
Personal space and territoriality are intimately linked to crowding. Humans feel crowded because others are intruding on their personal space and territory. Crowding is a perceptual, psychological notion related to our judgment of the number of people in a specific location.
Crowding is both a simple idea in the sense everybody has direct personal experience with it and a complicated one when considering its influence on people. People who have lived in an environment with high amounts of crowding are more likely to react well to less compactness in a new setting and vice versa. Certain locations can increase people’s tolerance to crowding, as well, such as traveling on a train.
Some things we only do once
We have all had that moment when we are quickly reminded or learned about the entire concept of space and territoriality.
Perhaps, you sat in a chair that your grandfather had already claimed as his. You better find yourself another spot. Grandpa had this one staked out for a long time. In theory, it is his even if it’s not. And what makes that side of the bed yours? Did I miss the memo stating that we are all positional sleepers?
This whole space thing started way back once upon a time. Yea, we can probably blame it on Goldilocks and those three bears. After all, they are the ones that claimed rights to their spaces as the story goes. Papa Bear says someone has been sleeping in my bed, someone’s been sleeping in my bed said Mama bear, someone’s been sleeping in my bed, and they are still there, whined the Baby bear. Thus, Goldilocks invaded their space.
I learned my lesson about space the hard way at a very young age. My younger brother Gary has always been an avid fisherman. It seems from the time he could walk, he had a cane pole in his hand, and his love of fishing manifested from there.
Well, one day, my folks took us fishing on a pier. And as usual, Gary was catching fish one after another. Meanwhile, I had positioned myself five feet away, perched on a pink stool with my matching pink rod and reel. Time passed, and the score was Gary 5 fish, Gayle 0 fish, just one wad of sea moss, tangled in one of those plastic things meant to keep beer cans together in a six-pack.
None the less this adventure was not fairing well for me. Gary decided he was ready for his usual honey bun and yahoo chocolate drink, so he took his pole and went to the cooler. Low and behold, I saw an opportunity to capitalize on a moment: Yea, even six-year old’s know how to work the system.
I methodically moved right into the spot he was previously fishing. I figured if it worked for him, it would work for me. I was sure now I would catch a fish. Surely Gary would not mind, I thought. After all, he did not own the pier so I could be anywhere I wanted. Wrong. Think again princess.
After casting my line with confidence, I waited patiently for the first tug that lets you know a fish is checking out your bait. I felt it and figured any minute now, at least a 5lb fish was going to grab my bait, and victory would be mine.
That did not happen.
Instead, my brother came up and saw me in what he firmly declared as his space. This little four-year-old punk brother demanded that I go back to my pink stool area. I was not about to bulge. No way. I was going to catch me some fish come hell or high water. Gary saw differently. That was his spot, and those fish belonged to him.
He took matters into his own hands as any four-year-old might. He pushed me off the pier, a tactic intended for him to regain his space. Luckily, as native Floridians, we were both great swimmers. I didn’t drown, but I did land on an oyster bar.
I’m not talking about the kind where you drink or eat slimy pieces of flesh, but rather the oysters piled together on the bottom of the sea in their hard shells with knife-sharp edges. Oyster bars or oyster beds, as some people call them, are dangerous. They can slice and dice you like nothing else, I can confirm.
At this point, I started screaming at the top of my lungs in pain. While my brother yells at me, “be quiet you are scaring the fish off.” My mother heard the commotion and saw my head bobbing with a blood-covered face. She yelled for my dad, and he threw a line out to pull me up to the pier. I looked like I had been in a war and lost all battles. There was not more than an inch of my body that did not have a deep cut. It looked like a jigsaw puzzle.
Wrapped in a ragged towel, my parents rushed me to the emergency room, where I was stitched up as best as possible, given a mega-dose of antibiotics and a child-appropriate pain killer.
For the next five days, I was in pure agony. I spent my time in bed writing ads that I intended to circulate as soon as I could move. My ads read, four-year-old territorial brother free to a good homeand another said little brother up for adoption, fishing pole included.
None the less this was the incident that taught me about personal space and territory. Today, I remain guarded, respectful, and aware of space that might belong to someone else, at least in thought. I remind you to tread with caution as you move in on others. All space is not created equal.
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Impact of personal space in psychology
The phrase “personal space” means the physical distance between two persons in a social, familial, or work setting. Consider your personal space the distance between your body and an invisible shield created by the mind.
An invisible “spatial envelope defines a person’s personal space.” This would be the area around the body that is considered private and under personal control. Personal space, in essence, extends the bounds of “I” or “me” beyond the skin and to the immediate surroundings. The size of this buffer zone can change, often unconsciously.
The primary function of this invisible second skin is to protect us. It can mean something as innate as defending yourself against a physical threat, such as a predator. Additionally, it is part of the framework for connecting socially, and it is the foundation for all of our social relationships. It has a significant impact on how we behave, comprehend one another, and how we feel about one another.
The space between you and your invisible shield or envelope will most certainly vary according to many things, such as how thoroughly you know someone, your connection with them, how deeply you trust them, and your cultural norms.
For example, you would have a minor personal space preference if you know someone well or if you’re accustomed to living in a crowded area. Alternatively, if you’re interacting with a stranger or used to wide-open spaces, you would naturally want more personal space.
Concepts of personal space around the world
If you have any experience with traveling, you have almost certainly been in a situation where somebody in a public area wants to stand closer to you than you would usually allow.
Under your breath you scream “get out of my space.”
This is because personal space differs significantly across different countries. When you look into the causes behind these social norms, several theories come up. For instance, the way people define personal space is largely influenced by temperature. Our age and gender also play a role, but a significant determining factor is where we are raised. As the saying goes, location, location, location.
Some parts of the world are divided into ‘contact cultures,’ such as the Middle East, Southern Europe, and South America. At the same time, the rest usually have a ‘non-contact culture,’ such as North America, Asia, and Northern Europe. People tend to stand further apart from one another in non-contact cultures as compared to contact cultures.
A study showed that people from South American countries generally require less personal space than locals from Asia. In Argentina, strangers were asked to maintain distance in some areas, but friends could gather nearby. Outsiders are expected to keep their distance in Romania, for instance. Friends, on the other hand, can approach you much closer.
Saudi Arabians are more distant from their acquaintances than Argentinians are from strangers, while Hungarians like to keep loved ones and outsiders at a safe distance.
Certain commonalities exist throughout different cultures, such as that women prefer personal space more than men or that older people tend to keep more distance from each other than the younger generation.
How do humans exhibit territorial tendencies?
Territoriality is a nonverbal communicative behavior that pertains to how people use the area around them to indicate possession and ownership of regions and belongings.
The scientific and psychological concept stems from observations of how animals create and preserve their territories. For example, you might compare your personal space to a barrier you do not want to be breached. We will talk about animalistic territorial tendencies in the next section, but first, we will discuss how humans exhibit this behavior.
Some people are subconsciously more territorial than others, while others are acutely aware of this fact and make their comfort zone known to people in various ways. For example, a student who puts their bag or books on an empty chair next to them essentially marks their territory.
My brother marked his space with a stringer of fish. That stringer of fish said stay away sis. If only I had known then what I do now perhaps I would have fewer scars.
In comparison, a student who keeps their belongings to the confines of their desk or chair sends out a message that they do not mind sharing the space around them with others.
Territoriality can also refer to states or countries and even governmental and societal concepts. For example, a sovereign nation can teach its population common ideas that contribute to territoriality, exemplified by nationalism. On the other hand, the territoriality of a state is influenced by national patriotism, shared religious customs, and politics.
People react to territory or personal space invasions in different ways, based on their comfort levels, cultural norms, and even gender. Men typically possess a strong sense of territorialism, and thus, they more commonly challenge other people’s boundaries. Hence, when a woman’s personal space is under question, she is more likely to move away, giving up her territory. Refusing to give up your territory by not moving away is a response more commonly found in men.
My Terrier attacks if another dog enters her eating space, my friend has an anxiety attack and my brother he’ll just push you over the edge.
Territoriality in different species
In animal behavior, territoriality is the concept of an animal defending its sociographical area against threat or competition by using agonistic behavior or physical aggression. Territorialism is prevalent in only a few species, such as wolves, crocodiles, or hippos. If a territorial animal wants to identify their territory, it can do so by scent marking, using visual displays of dominance, vocalizing its authority, or ritualized aggression.
Sir Luke, my male Pomeranian finds pleasure marking his territory at every fire hydrant and tree in his sphere of influence. I can’t stand to tell him there have been many other legs hiked before him. He needs to feel this is his space.
Most animal species have a home range, a designated area where groups of animals occupy but rarely defend. The home ranges of different species often overlap, but these groups tend to avoid each other’s space instead of confronting or expelling one another.
Some species demonstrate polyterritoriality, in which they claim or defend more than one territory. It is a behavior commonly seen in humans, as they claim ownership over multiple lands or properties. Have you heard the line something about who has the gold rules?
How do personal space and territoriality differ?
Personal space refers to the area around a person that they consider to be psychologically theirs. When their personal space is invaded, many people experience feelings of anxiety, anger, or discomfort. Territoriality is often used to express ownership over an area or possessions.
The concepts of personal space and territoriality are inextricably linked. We construct buildings, install fences, and place other marks to deter intruders from invading our proclaimed zone. Physical boundaries are a clear indicator of your authority over an object or place to the rest of the world. The invisible shield, in this sense, becomes literal.
With personal space, however, the line is blurry and can change with circumstances. For example, specific experiences can subconsciously make your need for personal space more significant, while time and attachment to another person can make that need less.
The way we establish our territories is determined by certain factors, such as your concern for safety, the value of a place or object, etc. The feature of understanding and observing the formal laws of territoriality is vital in comprehending human behavior and perception, just as it is with personal space. These are subjective and formed as a result of social interactions.
Concluding remarks
Personal space is a communicative technique similar to posture, contact, and facial expressions. However, it is also an infinitely adaptable system influenced by various situational cues, the nature of our relationships, personal qualities, and cultural and social experiences.
Personal space allows us to interact comfortably while also protecting us from physical harm. Humans have an innate sense of ownership over their surroundings, which is where territoriality comes into play. Both personal space and territoriality are defense mechanisms derived from our basic instincts to protect ourselves and assert dominance over one another.
Oops, sorry if I’m in your space. I’ll step back. But that’s my territory.
Get out of my space.